hmmmm well another early morning post..well get used to that my fellow new fangled world wide web traversers this is what happens when you are a pasty sweat creature to the man(cook for red lion) workin the swing shift. Seriously I would rather collect highly moistorious freshly released dog feces with my bare hands than work swing. Provided the feces is collected in the morning that is. And you know, let me tell you... I know the cure for teenagers with uncertainty regarding their futures, I live the cure friend. Let me take you back.....back....okay too far..acid wash.. okay forward...ah no before Obama..back ah there we go.Good old 2006. Back when W was the current CEO of ass clown enterprises(yahesh best i can do its early...late whatever kiss it...your an ass clown) and...well Britney was still craz(ier)y? Not a very distingushed year it seems but this is the year oh...well I was working at WinCo right? Right. I remember those orange and turqoise accents anywhere. And the geniusly white tile floors am I bitter? no..no..NO........PE NOT AT ALL. Well I was hired as an endentured cart wrangler but they transferred me soon after to maintanence(the boy janitor) where they needed immediate help)... based on my one gigantic qualification of being eighteen. Because seventeen year olds are horribly underqualified to mop up fifty eight foot trails of feces and shattered jars of pickled beets..APARENTLY. Soo yeah this was going along great...great...so naturally I decided to transfer back to carts...which did not work out...because well this part doesn't really matter? No really I'm not avoiding here but this is all just exposition anyway. Backstory. So anywho ladies and gents it don't work out. So I walk up one fine day halfway through work and say okay psssh here's my two weeks toots.(so i may or may not be taking some liberties here but hey it ain't like you were there) And after a disgustingly short pause there is something along the lines of "okay". So there I stand quickly stammering something like "okay then well glad that is settled." Oh hey boss no stop. Oh I was your favorite? In 33 and one quarter years of grocering experience? Oh a raise....
(well let's stop short of complete fiction.) So I finish the week and boom. Jobless scum. Oh yeah and I also went home that night and told my fiancee I had quit. HA. She was totally in the know. And yes she did still marry me. Small wonders. So at the (hot cattle) prodding of my oh so meak and mild and contented fiancee I applied EVERYWHERE and checked in on the applications twice every four minutes. So somewhere in the there was a red lion dishwashing job. And thus history was made. So in complete desperation this job came my way. And so flash forward three years and two months(ish). There is josh, superstar, having worked his way up from the lowly humid climes of thee so named "pit".... to prep cook... to line cook.(And no this part is not fiction) December 09. Laid off my friend. Food and Beverage department restructuring. Had just succesfully applied for our first apartment two months prior because we were sooooo certain in my job's stability. So flash forward(shorter trip) to may of 2010. Line cook position opens at the lion  rouge and presto alakazaam old job back. But see I thought being laid off was a sign. I was already unhappy with my job before the lay off date and it all seemed to be a sign. You're free to start over. Clean slate. But hey the unemployment was running out in June(which was so wonderfully extended by the government in July. Or so I read in the paper in the break room. Bastards.) and I really really liked my apartment. So there I was. And here I am. And I am just realizing I only ever applied at red lion out of utterly complete desperation. Oh.. well that doesn't exactly make me unique in that position now does it? Happens all the time, everywhere. Teenage kids about to be unexpected parents...well forget that music degree. Graveyard convience store attendants gotta come from somewhere. So I'm going back to college in the fall.  I would like to some day be a....well that part isn't really important either. This job really is the cure for an uncertain future. If you live what you sure as hell don't want it suddenly comes screaming into focus. At least it did for me. Good night my fellow anybody that happened to stumble this obscure little blog with currently zero followers(good thing any pride I had washed off in high school).  Two people looked but did not follow. I will find you. But for now...good night.